becoming “that” girl

We all have a higher self. I write about this often. The ideal version of ourselves that we’re always striving to become.

We get to discover, or in better words, create that higher self. 

It’s anything we want to be.

My higher self is confident. Funny. On time. She remembers birthdays. She loves to read. 

She is soft. Gentle. Kind. But also powerful. Larger than life. A force to be reckoned with. 

She is vulnerable, but extremely secure in herself. She doesn’t tolerate guilt or shame. 

She is unbothered with how others perceive her.

My higher self is cool. She gives the best advice. She can sit in boardrooms with billionaires and command the energy. 

She is a present mother. An intentional lover. A consistent friend.

I have daydreamed of this woman for most of my life. The dreaming, is the fun part. I’ve spent years perfecting her Pinterest board in my head.

But when do we get to become that person?

Better yet, how do we become that person?

One word.

And it’s going to give you flashbacks from piano lessons.

Practice.

I know it’s kind of obvious and a little anticlimactic, but let me blow your mind with this quote.

“The Universe isn’t testing you. It’s just giving you an opportunity to practice who you say you want to be.”

READ IT AGAIN!

The Universe isn’t TESTING us. It’s giving us opportunities to PRACTICE WHO WE SAY WE ARE!

This has created a shift in mindset for me.

I now look at the obstacles in my day as challenges. Almost like a game.

An opportunity for me to show up as my higher self. To handle the situation as she would. 

If my higher self is patient, how am I ever going to get there without situations that would require me to demonstrate patience?

These challenges, these opportunities to show up as our higher selves, are sprinkled throughout our day. They’re everywhere.

And acknowledging one of these “challenges” is half of overcoming it.

Most of the time, we are too conditioned and comfortable in our ways to even realize we’re being given opportunities to change.

So now, when I am faced with uncomfortable feelings and unfortunate events, I try to find that opportunity.

What quality in my higher self will I embody if I overcome this situation?

I’ve had a long year of trying to rebuild my confidence from square one. 

It’s felt nearly impossible at times.

Some days, I have it all figured out. I’m on top of the world. And the next day, some random girl makes a tiktok about how much she hates me…and I’m back at square one again.

But once I read that quote, about the universe giving us practice to be who we say we are, I had a major breakthrough.

Every time I come across a mean video, a defamatory comment, or anything that threatens my self esteem, I realize I have the chance to put my confidence into action.

I imagine God saying, “Hey, don’t look at me. You asked for this. You wanted this!”

Because at the end of the day, that is what I want. The highest version of myself is wildly confident. Bottom line. It’s one of the most important qualities my higher self possesses. It’s one of the first things people say about her. She shows up as herself in every room she walks into. She thinks so highly of herself, it doesn’t matter if anyone thinks differently. Her cup is filled first and foremost. She is unaffected by how others view and perceive her. She knows she is enough, and she knows thats enough.

So how do I bridge the gap between THAT girl, and the girl I am?

Practice.

Like anything we want to be good at. Practice.

I now look at arguments as now opportunities for me to practice communicating effectively and in a calm manner.  (older me is wayyyyy good at that.)

Traffic and long grocery store lines are now chances for me to practice being present & patient. 

When I’m feeling intimidated and overwhelmed at work, I know it’s time for me to practice being a leader.

Practice. Practice. Practice. 

Until you catch up to THAT girl.

I promise you will.

I wouldn’t say I’m all the way there yet. To being my higher self. And I guess that’t the next question…do we ever fully arrive? Or is life just picking up those versions of us along the way?

I don’t know but I guess I have a little while to figure it out.

But I will say, that with only a few months of “practice”…my confidence is already growing. 

My foundation is secure as fuck.

I know exactly who I am, and I have come such a long way.

Now, when I come across a mean video, or a mean comment, I take pleasure in understanding I have a choice.

A choice to react, and handle it as I have been, or a choice to be strong and keep scrolling.

A choice to step in and BE my higher self. 

What would she do?

And the answer is always easy.

She'd keep scrolling.

So with her as my guide, I keep scrolling too.

I love you guys

Keep practicing :’)

Ind